female in the eyes of the law. In a recent case in England the judge ruled that an operated TS was not really a female biologically speaking and her marriage was annuled. So, from this standpoint, I could never really be a female anyway. Since the operation would not make me "real" in this sense, I realized that it would accomplish nothing for me that I had not already accomplished and I abandoned the idea.
Today life for me is much the same as for any other unmarried working woman. It is said that woman's work is never done and I can attest to that. But please understand that I love this life and would not change back for anything. I don't put down my former life, it was successful and enjoyable and my life today is the better because of it. I have about everything that I need and I'm happy. What would surgery add that would make things any better? Perhaps a man? As a man my- self I was not a homosexual, and surgery would not make me want a male sexually. I remember what Susanna said in one of her columns, "I don't want sex, I want femininity." Well, I already have femininity and that's enough. Life today is better than I had ever dreamed it could be. I have achieved my original goal (to be a woman) but I have done it by my own efforts and not just from the necessity following an irreversible act of surgery. I've made it and I'm glad!
Since writing the above and submitting it to Virginia I have had an additional experience worth recounting. A favorite Aunt of mine died recently and I had to fly to Oakland to attend her funeral. Naturally my other relatives did not know of the change in my life so I had to revert, for one day, to my man self. I experienced exactly the same com- plete reversion that Virginia describes in her Virgin Views editorial in this issue. I had no expectation of having to make this change when she told me about her experience but nevertheless it happened to me just as she has described for herself.
One additional point of interest --- because of my speech defect I was always quiet and introspective as a man. I lived in a sort of shell. As Mary I have become much more outgoing. During this day as a man I found myself slipping back into the quiet retiring personality I had as a man. Suddenly I realized that I didn't have to live in that shell any more and as a result I "borrowed" some outgoingness from Mary and "grafted" it onto my manself with interesting results both to myself and to my relatives. They thought I was a changed person. If they only knew how changed! Wow!
11